Plastic water bottles are terrible for the environment. They will undoubtedly speed up global warming. Go out of your way to use them.
You may run into a slight problem here. You may be asking, “What if I don’t want to drink water? I enjoy an early morning gin and tonic as well as water!” I’m a step ahead of you. If you want to drink something besides water, follow these simple steps:
- Get a new water bottle.
- Pour the water out.
- Pour whatever you want to drink into the water bottle.
- Drink.
- Repeat using a new bottle every time.
If this is not possible for some reason, drink your beverage out of a glass. To make up for your foolish decision, throw out two (2) full water bottles. Here are a few rules you’ll have to follow when dealing with water bottle consumption:
- Drink, drink, drink. Then throw the empty bottles out. Then drink more. Then throw those empty bottles out. Then throw out some more full bottles for the heck of it.
- Use as many bottles as you can. If you have a bottle that is 3/4 full and it feels a bit warm, throw it out and grab a new one.
- DO NOT RECYCLE BOTTLES. According to bottledwaterblues.com, 60 million plastic bottles are thrown out every day in America. Guys, 60 million? We can do better. By the end of the year, I expect nothing less than 100 million every day. According to my calculations, if we each drink 1.4 bottles more per day, we’re set for our goal.
4 Comments
Sunday at 2:14 am
I’m proud to say I’m moving to Dubai. There can *only* drink bottled water!
Monday at 3:54 am
trinklebean,
What a good idea! Added plus – in Dubai, there’s a crapload of gas to use! Go for it!
matt
Friday at 3:41 pm
I like to take this to a new level…
1. Buy water and other products in biodegradable or recycled containers.
2. Empty contents into environmentally irresponsible plastic containers bought at your local dollar store.
3. When products are gone, throw dollar store containers in landfill.
4. Burn original containers after dousing with any handy petroleum based product.
Wednesday at 10:08 pm
Aww man I love this site. Unfortunely I go to the “2nd Greenest School” in america (CU Boulder). But I am feeling better after reading this. If I see one more “Please Recycle” sign I am going to burn every Toyota prius I see! I am so sick and tired of all this green crap, it is so trendy! I HATE IT!! Thank God I drive a 4×4 SUV
Too bad gas is going up though. Global Warming is not real, its fake. Just live, chill, and use plastic bottles.
Thats my rant! Cool Site!!